Image stolen from Metstradamus
Last Sunday Night at 11:30 PM (EST) , the television series LOST came to an end (and don’t believe anything the wife says about me crying when Sawyer reunited with Juliet). I loved that show almost as much as I have loved watching the Phillies since they hired Charlie Manuel in September 2004 (the same month the series debut). The last six years have been magic. I found myself wildly entertained on Wednesday nights and more importantly, the Phillies routinely beat the Mets in heart-stopping, dramatic fashion (Game ending unassisted Triple Play? You gotta be fucking kidding me!).
That Universe imploded Sunday night.
Obviously, we have been “flashed sideways” to some parallel Universe where Chris Dodd is hailed as a champion of financial reform and the Phillies really, really suck. We’re talking “not a single fucking run in three fucking games” suck. Biblical scale suckiness. But the most horrible part is that these humiliations were suffered at the hands of the Mets and their fans (read Smoke-monster).
“We have to go back”
This Universe sucks, and we all know it. Sure the Mets and their fans are lovin’ this…now. But how long before watching my beloved Phils get pounded like red-headed step children gets boring? Would it help if I said I’m sorry for taking so much delight in the Mets down-the-stretch meltdowns?
I was totally against this idea, until yesterday. But now I realize that the only chance we’ve got to get back to the lives we’re supposed to have is do the unthinkable (i.e. detonate a nuclear weapon). That’s right, I believe the oil leak in the Gulf has somehow made the Mets invincible and dropping a nuke into the ocean floor may act like reset button. It’s worth a shot anyway, and who knows, it may have the added benefit of stopping the leak. I guess it might trigger a Tsunami, but that’s a chance I’m willing to take.
Get me outta here!
Update 5/29/2010: The Fightins are still struggling at the plate, but I JUST WITNESSED ROY HALLADAY THROW A PERFECT GAME !!!!!!!!!!!!
Maybe I can hang out here for a little while…