Mark McHugh

Saint Hankenstein?

In stocks finance on Thursday, June 11, 2009 at 10:40 pm

saint hankensteinI know that TV appearances by uber-boob Steve Moore have proven to most of us  that the only thing the Wall Street Journal represents is the senseless slaughter of trees.  But from time to time, the shit gets so deep, real journalists take exception (no, not me stupid).

Comedy ensued when Matt Taibbi, author of the brilliant, must-read, Rolling Stone article, The Big Takeover took offense to a key-slappin’ douche-bag by the name of  Evan Newmark, who actually entitled a column, It’s Time to Enshrine Hank Paulson as National Hero. Rumor has is that Evan’s body of work also includes pieces entitled, Why don’t we name Streets after Hitler ? and Missing Michael Vick. But I digress.

Turns out Mr. Taibbi is also gifted with the hatchet (please note: I have corrupted the definition of “hatchet job” in my warped little mind.  I does not necessarily involve misrepresenting facts, but rather highlights absurdity and foolishness through the use of colorful explicatives), case in point:

Dear WSJ,

Just out of curiosity — did Evan Newmark ever work for Goldman, Sachs? And if the answer to the question is yes, don’t you think that might have been a good fact to disclose before he fellated Hank Paulson in his “Mean Street” column?

Matt Taibbi

Turns out Matt’s suspicions were right, so he wrote (among other things):

Can you imagine what a craven, bumlicking ass-goblin you’d have to be to get a job working for the Wall Street Journal, not mention up front that you used to be a Goldman Sachs managing director, and then write a lengthy article calling your former boss a “national hero”.

It’s mean, but it’s art.  Matt’s entire takedown can be found here:

But wait, there’s more to this story……..

Let’s talk Human Nature.  Ever known a craven, bumlicking ass-goblin, like Evan?  The astounding thing about them is that they completely fail to  realize that others know they’re full of shit.  They believe they can sell snowballs to Eskimos because they’re smarter than everyone else (think Scott Peterson).

Evan Newmark didn’t stop with the cannonization of Paulson.  He was on a roll.  He went on:

Who can doubt the amazing recovery of the credit markets? The best performing asset class so far in 2009 has been distressed debt, up by nearly 40%.


And the banking system? Investors are now throwing money at it. In May, $85 billion of fresh capital was raised by TARP banks. Bank of America alone has raised $33 billion in capital since the start of the year.

I am compelled at this point to insert a Hugo commercial:

In search of………………Greater Fools?

On my side of the rainbow,  Paulson is the greatest thief the world has ever seen, 12% of all mortgages are delinquent, and there’s at least one guy advocating using credit cards to buy gold, then defaulting on the card.  I’ve been wondering who these nimrods are, buying “distressed debt” and secondary offerings of insolvent banks, and who on earth they think they’ll be able to flip them to…..

Um…..get this….they think it’s us (hahahaha).  The “air pocket” in our markets must be enormous.  The really funny thing is, it is the rich who will be stuck holding the bag when no one shows up at their “green shoot” parties.  One thing’s for sure, they’ll need better propagandists than Evan.

Another compulsion……

Fun Fact: Zheng Xiaoyu was was director of the State Food and Drug Administration of the People’s Republic of China.  He was executed for accepting about $850,000 in bribes from pharmaceutical companies on July 10, 2007.


Goldman Sachs – Public Enemy #1


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: